Happy go Fucking Crazy

On the Political Importance of Gomes.

2009-07-07T02:15:05Z

Ministry for the
Welfare
Of
Garden
Gnomes

So recently I have become a bit... infatuated...

Ok.. Maybe a bit TOO infatuated.

I like them. They are comforting and lovely. They provoke images of childhood cartoons and magic fantasy lands. Who doesnt want to look out into their garden and see an ever-smiling, ever-safe and friendly little figure standing out there among the carrots and yew bushes? They are happy. Just to be there. Just to stand there with their pipe and little red hat and sit on a stone and just be there for you whenever you need a sense of security that only their calmness could offer. I love the little bastards... I love to think that their is something better then what we have right now in the world.

In a way, it is political.

Because, these gnomes and faeries and mushroom people that live in, within our minds, little boots and broken teapots and cans and roots and the like, they are nearly primitive communists. I mean, they live off the earth, am I right? They never war against each other, and it is a collective effort on each citizens' part to keep the society functioning and alive. You know, pass the water bucket down the line, or go and pick berries, or sweep out the lillypad.

Very much the way it was with the natives. However, with the natives it was more of a spiritual thing, and with the Gnomes it is more of a happy-go-lucky thing.

And the funny part is, that, no matter how much I hate kids for being total sponges of the media, kids are the only ones that could ever possibly imagine such a thing. Or even SEE it, in many cases.. And I am talking about kids that have had no outside influence. Like, back in the day when there was no TV or computer to rot the minds of the youth. When kids had jobs at 9.. Or hell, when they could walk. Kids now a days, between Sponge Bob and Naruto and all that, they can imagine things, yes. But what do they imagine? That their barbie dolls come alive? That their made-in-china princess dress makes them better then everyone else? Imagination is different now. Its strange, isnt it. How something so pure and timeless as imagination could change.

But when there was nothing to influence that imagination, this is what kids saw. Happy civilizations of creatures and critters that could get along and live by their means, live off the earth without hurting anyone or anything. IE: The EXACT opposite of where we are going.

Maybe if everyone in the world had a garden gnome. Maybe then, we could look at the rosy cheeks and snow-white beard and think:

Yeah. That's the idea.

~Lynch

Guess Who's back?

2009-06-13T02:50:01Z

Expect some more political nonesensery to come back at you AFF.

~L

This is Lynch for Antique Corner

2009-02-03T02:17:04Z

Antiques are the most precious of human remains. Usually, I would assert that humans are no good for nothing consumer, greedy, useless, harmful, pieces of shit not worth more then one toe of my dog´s paw.. And we are... But we had our better times in History. We have seen better days fo´sho.

And those few years that we were at our prime... Dear lord did we ever make some nice shit.

This nice shit has traveled for years and years, surviving every known force of nature and man you can think of. Water, Fire, Piss, Shit, Snot, Garbage, Wax, Wind, Rain, Mold, Puke, and everything in between.

And yet.... They stand tall. Filled to the brim with the luster of the yesteryear... Wood still trying to shine, silk still trying to be good enough for any lady who maybe wants to use it for that night out. It brings a tear to my eye, really. Quality products from the only time quality mattered, abused and left for dead. ¨Modern is in! Old is out!¨ And all that bullcrap.

But not me. Nah-Uhn. I love my antiques with the fury of 1000 suns. And I love other people´s antiques with the same fury.... Thus why I bring you this post today.

A SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT BROUGHT TO YOU BY TEIKKO LYNCH OF OMAHA (well.. not really):

Ladies and Gentlemen... Antique lovers worldwide.. I call upon your force once again to address a rather, painfully, substantially growing epidemic.

The Middle Class is attempting to perpetrate the sanctity of classic luxury once again.

^ THE ENEMY ^

First they disparage the walls of the automotive industry... Now they make a swift advance on our precious Antiques.. They are buying them up like hell rises tomorrow, sticking them in their 250,000 dollar suburban home, allowing their CHILDREN to snivel and drip all sorts of fluids on them! THEN after their child has destroyed the furniture, THEY TOSS IT INTO THE TRASHCAN or GIVE IT TO THE SALVATION ARMY.

Even when these pieces of history were as good as new back when they were first made, their owners were so aware of their value they would plop the child out and then quickly escort the shitting ball of snot to a wet nurse- FAR FAR AWAY. As to not destroy the furniture! The child could return when he was ready to respect the chaise and dining room table!

But not now, friends.. Not now.. .Now the child practically lives on the queen anne. The mothers buy antique cribs to boast about with their friends ¨Sally, Tammy, Tawny, Brenda¨ and ¨Lainie!¨. We shall only be thankful no suburban family can afford an authentic Victorian/Gothic Revival home.

Brothers, Sisters.. I call you out.. We must make a haste advance on suburban homes across America and take back what THEY don´t deserve. We must arm ourselves with wood polish and sandpaper, silk threads and an army of the pompous English hosts of Antiques Roadshow.

Saddle your horses! Heat up your 1923 Rolls Royce! Unlock the Bi-Wheels! The day of reckoning is upon us!

I introduce your acting Captain upon my current absence... Madame Bijoux of Pasadena:

She may be young.. But she is a 5 star Antique Corporal... Everybody´s saying there is no body meaner then this little old lady from Pasadena.

Many lives will be lost.. But many antiques will be gained as a result... God SPEED to you all, Chaps.

~Gen. Teikko Lynch~

CHIQUE BOUTIQUE!

2009-01-07T18:46:44Z

I had a little bit of thought on men and women today..

A while ago my mother said ¨Men want a woman that has all the attributes that they think themselves possess.¨ In other words, they simply want a mirror of themselves so they can be just a bit more egotistical then their 2 inch cock will allow.

Makes sense...

Then I was watching a David Chappell skit on men and women and he was talking about how men don´t want anything material, it´s all women, men just get the material stuff so they can please women and lure them into their little chastity trap.

I honestly don´t believe that..

Women like expensive, shiny, dressy things WHY?

It makes them look better for men.

MEN like expensive, shiny, dressy things WHY?

It makes them look better to women who want to look better for men.

Single handedly I have proved the ¨Big car- Small Cock¨ phenomenon. Expensive, shiny, lavish things are simply a better way to catch a submissive women.

Women don´t give a shit about material fucking things... UNLESS there is a man she can try to show off to.

So what do we have now?

We have.... men... buying things for women so she can look good to other men.

=

Men... Wanting to have a woman... that looks good to other men..

=

Men WANT to look good to other MEN.

And science will try to tell us that ¨oh.. well.. uhhh.... thats cuz... men .... is...... are.... hunters!!! yeahh... thats it... hunters..¨

New Theory: Men want to look good for other men because they are fucking gay. NOT because of their attraction to another man, per se, but because of their affiliation and worship for the Penis (See: Previous entry). Logical? I think so. More and more men are coming out in their 50s and 60s. These happily married, child laden men who were so seemingly normal suddenly are seen on tv marching down the street in a pink boa. The wives of these flamboyant morons are left with kids and a breaking pain in her heart that she was not able to satisfy the man who said he loved her (but was really taking it up the ass behind her back).

But society tells us to actually feel bad for these newly-outed men... Its that damn wife of his who oppressed him for so long! Bless the gays!

(lmao)

I say: FUCK the gays. Put your cock in your fucking pants so we can try and avoid and ¨straight¨ man avid and spontaneous penis worship at your little ¨chique boutique!¨

And I also say : WOMEN, GROW A FUCKING BACK BONE.

1. You don´t have to sleep with the first dude that says he loves you.
2. Buy a Cadillac, men like those, and real in the fucking fish, then have your pick.
3. WORK = MORE IMPORTANT THEN MARRIAGE.

Done.

~Lynch~

My Mooom..

2008-10-21T14:33:04Z

The Eyes and Ears both do a lot of listening.

However, the eyes listen to what they want to listen to, while the ears listen to everything.

I think people do more listening with their eyes then with their ears, I can say that one of the little redeeming features of Saint John is that a lot of people here listen with their ears (when their eyes are not scouting out for your wallet, that is).

My mother a while ago pitched to me the idea of everyone wearing hoods, so we could not see, but only hear.

Could solve a few world issues, no?

~Lynch~

The Upper Roooom.

2008-10-16T21:55:10Z

It is true! I have not posted in a shitstorm of a while.

I am getting pretty fucking sick of this little box to be honest with you... I am not exactly sure what to write... Ever.. Lately I have been.. not interested in writing, whatever I do write has been forced and soulless and it is driving me up the (padded cell) wall.

So what to talk about? I am not going to leave until I have spoken about fucking something..

Hopes and Dreams? That is a good one. I neeeever run out of hopes and dreams.

Dreamin is good... Dreamin is not a bad thing, it is always good to analyze your true desires in life, realistic or bullshit idea, it is always a good thing to analyze.

I don´t think a lot of people remember that everything we dream and dream again is possible. A lot of people sit at their little cubical or apartment desk and think there is no way out and that this is life forever and ever.

Well it ´aint. If I can go somewhere in life, any fucking moron with half a testicle can.

The only thing that pisses me off is that I meet people who complain so damn much, and then will not even try to get off their ass. You know? They would rather shut up about their dreams then actually lift a finger from the ashtray, and THAT is one of the many things that piss me off.

They sit there and go ¨shiiittt, bills are coming up and I have no food and I spent all my check money on booze¨.

Those people.. Those fucking temple-throbs on a shit-bag.... Just shoot them, because if they want to complain like that and wont do shit to help themselves then obviously they have signed a verbal contract that solidifies their utter hate for their lives and thus.. you have all the right in the world to kill em. Just do it. If life is that fuckin bad and they can´t help themselves then.. .you know... There is no reason they should be alive...

Logic, man. Logic.

Over all, I be tryin myself to be a better person and to better myself in life. You know... I am doing a bunch of crap right now that I do not want to do, things that are.... so trivial and nothing to me. But those things must be done to get what I want. And I know it is a fucking shot in the dark, but... In the end the shot in the dark is the same as continuing with life as it is. Continuing with life as it is and hoping things get better is a shot in the dark, and so is... you know... Really shooting in the fuckin dark. Ahahaha.

I got the cannon all loaded, because God gave me a rifle and said ¨Go forth and shoot in the dark.¨ And I gave the gun back to him and I said ¨I am going to need something fuckin bigger then that.¨ So I went out and bought a Cannon.

Figure, if you want to shoot in the dark, a bigger bullet will cover more area, right? Widen your chances of hitting that thing that we all strive to hit when we shoot in the dark.

Then there are those multi-fire gatling guns, the ones that spray bullets everywhere. Those are good for shooting in the dark too. Says so on the label.

~Lynch~

gottxistxtot @ 2008-09-29T00:51:00

2008-09-29T04:15:56Z

Long time no seeeeeeee!

I have been pretty busy not being busy at all, but decided to pop by and write a few notes on, once again, something I feel is completely important and totally meaningless.

FIRST bone to pick... Guitar Hero.

Yeah, you fucking heard me. Guitar Hero. I have never played the fuckin game and... all I can say is that it turns innocent teens into complete assholes... Ok sorry.. It turns fucking stupid teen assholes into EVEN BIGGER assholes, like Goatse sized assholes.

Yeah. Goatse, that is pretty fucking big, eh?

Something about this game brings me to think that it is nothing but pure evil. Something about it allows for 15 year olds with no life or money to feel like they are.. Oh, I don´t know... Led Zepplin or something. Because they can push a few colored buttons, they suddenly can play double-axes and sell out 50,000 person areas.

Soooommmehow.. These people who play Guitar Hero can conceive in their brains that they can critique other´s ACTUAL guitar skills.

Ohhh yes, so fucking sorry, pushing little squares to flying colors on beat IS indeed similar to strumming strings, and cutting cords and creating sounds to your own beat. I just forgot that! My fucking bad!

Put down the plastic guitar, turn off and return the play console, and use the 400 dollars to purchase yourself some nice jeans to wear to your job interview.

SECOND OFF.

Dani Filth.... Can someone tell me if he has either Gained 100 pounds and adopted an amazingly receding hair line, or remained the same weight, shrunk 4 feet and adopted an amazingly receding hair line.

THEN:

NOW:

It´s as though his entire body and face have taken a completely different shape and volume and width... I have never seen anything so..... strange in my life.

Jesus facking Christ.. And he is only 35, think of what shape he is going to be when he is 40! My God!

~Lynch~

Hitler....And.... Jesus.... Together.....

2008-09-12T23:11:14Z

Usually there are NO people I bow too.

But... There is an exception as of 3pm this afternoon. Angkras, the great writer, has made a holy blessing to this earth (Literally). I bow to Angkras, for being the most amazing human being producing fanfiction on the 3rd rock.

Jesus.. And Hitler.. In Sexitime.

_________________________________________________________________

In the halls of the Reichschancellory a German soldier was running to an office. when he reached the door he dropkicked it open. “Mine Furor! The Americans are inside Berlin!” Adolph Hitler looked up from his volksdesk rapidly. “Mein gott in Himmel! I must escape!” Quickly he ran to his secret underground laboratory. Scientists were running around and conducting scientific experiments. “Active the time machine!” shouted Hitler. Hitler could hear Americans shouting in the tunnel behind him, murdering innocent German scientists and soldiers to satiate their blood lust. “But mine Furor, the temporal coordinates are not set! You could be sent ANYWHERE!” “It is irrelevant, fool! I must survive so that National Socialism can continue!” The thoroughly chastised scientist activated the time machine, and Hitler was thrown through time – to 29AD!

When Hitler stepped through the portal he saw a beautiful man with blue eyes and a long beard. “Greetings, my son,” he said. Hitler looked around. “Where am I?” “In Israel, my son. Come, have lunch with me. My name is Jesus Christ.” Hitler was instantly amazed. He had been a devout Christian all his life and he was honored to eat dinner with Jesus. During lunch Hitler explained the tenets of National Socialism to the Messiah. To his delight, Jesus loved it! Within an hour Jesus was won over to National Socialism. Hitler felt joy in his heart. National Socialism would live again!

While they were talking Hitler found himself checking out Jesus' tight bod. If he wasn't Furor of Germany... But he wasn't Furor anymore,was he? That night when Hitler and Jesus were in bed together Hitler said “Jesus, what do you think of... love between men?” “What do you mean, Hitler?” Jesus asked. Hitler took a deep breath. He would have to be bold. “This is what I mean.” He leaned over and started Frenching with the Lord. At the same time he reached down and started tugging on his already turgid member (Christ slept in the buff).

Jesus broke off the kiss. “Hitler I – I don't know if I can do this. It feels so good, so right, but I'm afraid. I've never been with another man before.” “I've never been with a man, either, Jesus. I'm scared, just like you are, but we can't let our fears rule us! I love you, Jesus. Do you love me?” Hitler's eyes had tears in them. Jesus smiled. “Yes, Hitler. I love you.” They embraced. Again, they kissed passionately. Hitler continued to jerk Christ off. When he began to tense up Hitler lowered his head to Christ's stiff member and caught Christ's sticky seed in his mouth. There was an incredible amount of it and it splashed everywhere. When Hitler rose up again Jesus locked lips with him. He could taste his own salty semen in Hitler's mouth, and he didn't care. Jesus was happy for the first time in his life.

____________________________________________________________

Someone get me a coke and tray of shortbread cookies, because I just came!

-LYNCH-

BATTLE OF THE BATMAN(s)

2008-09-08T23:21:23Z

I, being a 10 year fan of the Bat, have taken the liberty to compile a list of the top Batman Movies and the ones that sucked so much donkey ass it almost hurt.

I will be comparing many things, including The Batman, The Enemy, Gotham City, The Batmobile, among many other things.

In Order of Worst to Best: LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

#7 - The Dark Knight (2008)- You are doing it WRONG.

Very very very wrong.

THE BATMAN: No. Wrong. Batman DOES have a tragic history. But Batman does NOT have a balloon shoved so deep into his ass he can´t crack a campy joke here and there. Batman is the seeker of justice, ¨I´m just an ordinary citizen!¨. He looks at things comically but he is still a man of truth. He is not a womanizer, true that Batman has had many girlfriends in the course of the movies but he is always monagamous during that time. The Batman in the Dark Knight was so pathetically serious, it had me saying ¨Why so Serious?¨

THE BATMOBILE: No, once more. Crappy, a pimped out VW.

THE BAD GUY: The only saving grace of TDK is the Joker.

Armed with amazing logic and the power to turn Gotham into an anarchic mess in less then 24 hours, The Joker has you rooting for him by the final scene of decision, The Batman seems to just spoil the fun, which is not supposed to happen with Batman. EVER.

THE ALFRED: I love Caine, he is a great actor and guy, but he did not do Alfred any sort of justice. When I think of Alfred, I think of a little old English man with little round glasses and a cute little tuxedo that walks around with a serving tray, not a half-drunk, mid-50s Scot with more style in dress then Bruce.

THE GOTHAM: NO. Where are all the big statues? The corny buildings? The Cheesy cars and people wearing suits/suit dresses constantly? Gotham is supposed to be a pimped out 50´s style New York, not a Los Angeles.

THE SMEX: None. And BTW: Rachel was an ugly fuck, to look at her face straight I needed to turn my head completely upside-down.

OVERALL: 2/5. Go see the Joker. He kicks ass. Other then that, Bruce Wayne could pierce my heart with how sharp his cheekbones are.

#6 - Batman Begins - Once Again. No. Wrong.

THE BATMAN: Once more portrayed by the lovely (cough) Bale. This came before TDK, however it still retains all the ¨more hollywood shocks, less DC pops¨ theme. The Batman suit was kept to a minimum, no colors, no detail other then the grotesque amount of muscle armor. Seemingly the Bat belt is nothing but boxes and the cape seems to always have wind behind it to keep it flowing. A Pathetic Portrayal of out beloved Bat. I placed this under TDK because I was a fan of how it went back in time to the life of Bruce Wayne.

THE BATMOBILE: No different then the one in TDK:

THE BAD GUY: In this case, Bad Guys. Very good portrayals of Scarecrow among others, I appreciated the accuracy.

THE ALFRED: Caine again. No, Again.

THE GOTHAM: Seemingly filmed between a random Florida Road and a house, there basically is no portrayal of Gotham.

THE SMEX: That fucking Rachel again.

#5 Batman Forever - Getting Better, Getting Closer.

THE BATMAN: Although I have a huge problem with Val Kilmer´s feminine lips, there is no denying he was totally into the Batman role. The suit was more Batman then I had originally anticipated, and I enjoyed that they actually included Robin for once. Chris did a great job as the sidekick, a few laughs here and there, this is a definite must see on my opinion.

THE BATMOBILE: THERE it is, there is the campy, crazy, winged Batmobile I have been waiting to see. THANK YOU.

The wheels were a bit too much for me, it is supposed to be for stealth, not pimp points, but we are close now to what it is supposed to be.

THE BAD GUY: Two Face and The Riddler were portrayed masterfully, with all the pizzaz and humor of the comics in which they were introduced (1943 and 1948). Two Face is sporting his multi-suit and the Riddler, played by humor master Jim Carry, kept to the original green-suit/riddle cane of the original days.

THE ALFRED: Michel Gough, where have you been my whole life? Playing in virtually all the Batman films, the man picked up a thing or two about Alfred. He is Bruce´s friend, butler, parent, he is the comic´s comic relief and life. My hat off.

THE GOTHAM: Closer to what it is supposed to be, but mostly computer animated so there are major gaps, as well as everything is looking way too close to Normal. Gotham is not a normal city. Gotham has a batman protecting it and random bad ass dudes coming from no where, it does not deserve to look like our cities, friends.

THE SMEX: Although it is not direct, the way Batman and Robin look at each other... come on peoples.

#4 Batman Returns: Danny DeVito, a hell of a lot of Penguins and a sexy Dominatrix!

THE BATMAN: Michel Keaton IS Batman. HE IS the Batman of the silver screen generation. He attributes comedy, sarcasm, lust and serious-kick-assness in his portrayal of the Bat. I made this movie number 3, only because it is not as good quality a movie as the others, but Directed by Tim Burton, the legendary stop-motion animator, nothing could really go too bad.

THE BATMOBILE: FIIIIYYAA! Now THAT, that right there, makes the Batmobile, from the dawn of Batman, fire from the ass of the Batmobile has been the signature drive in the scene transitions, and this Batmobile gots it.

THE BAD GUY: Danny DeVito plays the Penguin in this one, and Pfeiffer plays the Catwoman. The Penguin is a fantastic character and he was done justice, but it left me asking: WHERE THE FUCK DID ALL THOSE PENGUINS COME FROM??? Ahem. But The Catwoman was portrayed far better then in her main feature ¨CatWoman¨ when portrayed by Hallie Barry. She has quite the character in this one, and the transformation from a shy secretary to a seeker of revenge was amazing to watch.

THE ALFRED: Michel Gough again. You can´t Gough wrong with Gough. :D

THE GOTHAM: YESSSSSS. YESSSSSSSS, CHARLES. This is the Gotham that built Gotham.

Yes. The massive statues of random people, lights, smoke, turning kittie heads and insanely overly sized buildings, this Gotham has the spunk I expected. Yes, I say. Yes.

THE SMEX: Major, Major lust happening between Catwoman and Batman, very sad at the end when he looses her.

OVERALL: 3/5 - Well done. Eat Floor.Very high in Fiber.

#3 - Batman and Robin - Ya´ll can fuck yourselves.

THE BATMAN: George Clooney, Peace be upon him, stars as the dark knight in this comical feature. You know what? Everyone hated this movie except for me. Everyone fucking hated it´s guts and George, poor man, was left ridiculed and broken like a hooker on Santa Monica.

I loved him, he was awesome, Geroge Clooney is actually what I would expect a Bruce Wayne to be. Bruce Wayne is accompanied by Robin and Batgirl, Batgirl being the niece of Alfred, coming from college due to word that Alfred is sick. Moving on...

THE BAD GUY: Starring Mr.Freeze and the lovely Poison Ivy, portrayed by Gov.Arnnie S and Uma Thigh-man. I don´t care how campy it was, but come on. A love-struck-depressed Super-Jack Frost and a villain that could very well advertise for Green Peace.... What´s not to love?

THE ALFRED: Once again... Mr. Gough. The amazing, under-rated butler. Nuff said.

THE BATMOBILE: Looks pretty damn cool and fits in with the rest of the movie, not as subtle or sleek as the Batmobile´s of Keaton´s Batman, however it is glowy and... firey and... you know..

THE GOTHAM: You honestly do not see much of Gotham, but it looked way toooo normal for my tastes.

THE SMEX: Where there is a Robin, there is a way!!

OVERALL: 3 1/2 / 5 - BATSKATES!

#2 - Batman - The Movie (1966)

THE BATMAN: Adam! Adam! I love you Adam! No muscles, no fancy CGI, no fancy nothing. Just good old entertainment. Robin is as awesome as a Robin could be. Batman´s underage Ward/Sexslave gets his ass kidnapped every 2 minutes, and thus the purpose to the movie is for the Dark Knight (although not so dark, more gray then dark) to save him every 2 minutes and combat the Riddler and The Joker.

POW! BANG! WHAP!

THE BATMOBILE: POW! BANG! POW! LINCOLN FUTERA!

That is right, it is just a regular car with some awesome pimpin gear.

I want this Car. I am not kidding. It is just.... It makes me want to say:

¨TO THE BATMOBILE, BITCHES!¨

THE BAD GUY: All our favorite characters appear in this flick!

The infamous Cesar Romaro playing The Joker, Lee Meriwether as Catwoman, Burgess Meridith as The Penguin, and Frank Gorshin as the Riddler.

At the time, the Comic introduction of all of these Characters, including the Batman, was so recent that it is impossible to be on the spot with the character portrayals. Frank Gorshin is my favorite Riddler, even more then Jim Carry, mainly because the Riddlers Character was a lot less complicated at the time. The Penguin, although a bit starved, was like an insane Willy Wonka of evil, and nothing needs to be said for Cesar and Lee, two great actors in great roles.

THE ALFRED: Not my Gough, but Napper does an outstanding job playing Alfred Pennyworth.

THE GOTHAM: Gotham looks like a desert in Nevada. Looks like most of it was done in the backyard of the Bruce Wayne Estate. But the characters were so good that it was to the point where the scenery did not matter not one bit. All you were focused on was Batman and Robin.

THE SMEX: I need not say nothing.

Dununununununununuununnnn HOMOSEXITIME!

OVERALL: 4 1/2 out of 5 - Whoop. Go get it. NOW.

And the prize for number 1 is..........

BATMAN (1989)!!!!!

THE BATMAN: You got the yellow! The BLACK! The Silver! The Grey! The Keaton! The humor! The body! You are ready to succeed in everything! Phail doth not becommith of you!

THE BATMOBILE: The Fire! The black! The wings! The utter lack of fail!

THE BAD GUY: The Joker! The Nicholson! The Accurate Story! The Purple! No Fail!

THE ALFRED: The Gough! The ultimate fail killer!

THE GOTHAM: The everything!

THE SMEX:

¨Come closer Batsie!¨

OVERALL: 9000000/5. Fucking Period.

~Lynch~

Metallica, Led Zepplin, The Beatles, They all have ONE thing in Common....

2008-09-04T23:35:01Z

THEY ALL SUCKED MAJOR DONKEY COCKLES.

Now there it is, the line. The thin thin line between talent and hype.

Just because an artist opens up the gate for a genre or a generation, DOES NOT MAKE IT GOOD BY DEFAULT.

What else do these bands have in common?

The Beatles opened up the love and peace generation of pot smokers.

Nirvana Opened up the grunge revolution.

Metallica opened up the metal revolution.

Kiss opened up the glam rock revolution.

Led Zepplin opened up the 10 hour guitar solo revolution, although Metallica quickly caught on.

So people seem to think that because these people have a vision, there must be talent there. And this thought has destroyed the opportunities for young, fresh artists to come out and get in the limelight. It would be hard, too, with some 50 year old alcoholic rocker standing in your way, desperately trying to cling onto every cent and their youth and public respect.

I also have a theory:

These bands also have something else in common: SUBSTANCE ABUSE.

Perhaps, because people were so heavily influenced by drugs at the time, they associated the good feeling from the THC with the music. And the result is 60 year old men still listening to them, trying to get that feeling back, which, unknown to them, was from the drugs, not the music. The foreresult also includes, such a massive amount of people superficially enjoying These bands that the younger generation starts to hype it out, and because they are so easily influenced, they think it is ¨Awwwwssummmm duuuhhde!¨

And I stand there and question it.

¨What? What are you all on..?¨

¨Duuhddee! Listen to Master Of Puppets! It is like... amazing!!¨

9 minutes. The fucking song was 9 minutes long. I was sitting there for 9 minutes.

In the end, I clap. I say, good job Metallica, you were able to tie in lyrics ripe with delusions of grandeur, totally irrelevant guitar solos, distant vocals (I suppose the sound recording technology was not good enough at the time to make the artist sound less then 2 miles away), with AMAZING stamina. Because I know that is what you are going to need to listen to that shit.

Coffee. Lots of it.

And then there is the Beatles, another something I need to shit on..

Seeing as every Beatles album went a something like this:

¨uuhh.. uahhnnn... uuuuuuhhhnnaaannhhh..... lllooooahhhhnnnnn....¨

It is almost impossible to not smell the weed smoke and LSD coming from your mp3 player. My mother likes to say it was John Lennon that was the good one, not the rest, but if he participated in that, HE IS NOT FORGIVEN.

BY the way. STOP BLAMING YOKO ONO. That is another thing that pisses me off. She did nothing wrong, they fell in love, if you are so retarded as to think no whore could ever touch your precious pot-rock band, you are holding onto a dreammmmm!

Anyway. I will leave you with this:

So that moron from Metallica is coming after Napster.. eh...?

~Lynch~

Of Saddle Shoes and Pretty Boys

2008-08-26T07:14:15Z

I honestly don´t know what to do anymore.

I love hardwood floors, French wine, pretty boys and black and white movies. I feel as if I was born in the wrong era. Is it because I see or feel these things and smell substance on them as if I made them myself?

I see an old, turn of the century house, it may not be a glass mansion so sought after by today´s generation, and I want to go inside and lay down. I hear 50s Christmas music and it feels like I should be at home, drinking hot chocolate, I watch a black and white no-talkie movie and enjoy myself more then if I was in a bustling hollywood blockbuster, chalk-full of budget and CGI. I walk into an antique store and act as if I were a child that just got a candy.

I live in a city that has more old century homes then anywhere else in the Continent. What happened to them? Oh, nothing, they are just all inhabited by drug addicts and owned by landlords who are too cheap to restore so just let it go to HELL. I could CRY when I see the ugly-ass lino they put over the hardwoods because they are too fuckin lazy to just re-polish. As a result, one of the last places in Canada with brownstone, original oak hardwoods and marble mantles is being overrun by condemnation permits and then mobile homes.

☹☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☹

It is like nothing is sacred anymore!

I suppose older things appeal to me because they just... They have so much soul, so much substance. I know that the antique table I buy may be old, but it was made by someone with their own two hands. Made for quality, and proving this through withstanding the test of time.

Everything used to be done with so much soul, so much spirit, so much happiness and a cry for joy in life. There is no pessimism in me about the old days, the old days were hope. It was people smiling to you when you walked down the street, and tipping the milkman and picking up hitch hikers because you knew everything was cool. Those smiling Coca Cola ads from the 1920s always stood out to me in Antique Stores, people having a good time, enjoying life.

Every movie, though seemingly corny to us today, was filmed with such precision and detail, that even when scenes were mere paintings behind the actors, it was done correctly and to animation. Now, we are so lazy we can barely consider watching a movie unless it has a full script and graphics to the T which will spoonfeed us adrenaline until we puke popcorn and jujubes all over the seat below us.

Ohhh and the people. The people were intense passion incarnate. The women were defined and intelligent, special hovels and cafes for women were built where the ladies of the century could discuss politics, the latest book or fashion. Unlike the women of today, the women of previous centuries knew who their foe was, and were too smart to be fooled, for their era was the era of enlightenment, of true revolutionaries and feminists. Where you could only find ego in the disgusting corner of the upper governments. Poets, Artists, Architects, Scientists, all of the greatest of the great minds were born before 1940.

And the men? I am sure you all know by now my strong affection for the well-groomed pretty boy of society. The boy who says, ¨Dear lord, I don´t want to look and smell like an ape today!¨ Everything from Corsets to High Hats, the men of the centuries were dressed to the T. From 1850-1920 was the absolute hight of men´s fashion. For once in history the men looked as classy and simple as the women. Please don´t get me started on Yardley Brilliantine. Needless to say it should be an absolute law for all men.

It is like people really had something worth living for. People had books worth living for, people had shoes worth living for, people had friends worth living for, people had sunsets and sunrises worth living for. Now, THERE IS NOTHING worth living for. The world is on a steady decline and has been for the last 60 years. I jumped off the world, pulled out my parachute and am trying to find ground to no avail.

Ahhh yes. I often drift off in dreams of living in the Charlie Chaplin era instead of the Charlie Manson, and even more often - I go on mad, murderous rants about it all.

LUL

2008-08-19T01:23:56Z

LUL! In lawsuit, a laughing lampray of linguistics! A lying libertarian loyal to lemons and Lenin, a lonely light lashing lustfully through the licking Locust that is logic! Like a lame limerick lacing a lady of easy virtue, a lag in the lake of land pirates, a lansprisado lay lathy. LUL I lumber to you, the lade of love forgotton bastard kin. Lopsided law, lollypops of lombard fever, loll tongued lackey of the damned. In the light, I will simply lobcock. In the lux, you may call me Lynch.

Freedom and Capitalism

2008-07-23T18:27:52Z

As I was talking to my friend last night, a little blurb about freedom and capitalism came in:

¨[sic].... We are only free in the constant effort to achieve freedom....¨

When you think about it, freedom is only as free as the agenda behind the person allowing for the freedoms, which, in any other circumstance, should be unalienable rights.

Any country or religion would deny human beings even the most basic of necessities and then, once an insane riot breaks out, hand a small token over sheepishly, as if to say ¨we see you revolting, and we want you to shut up¨. Upon the acquiring of such token, the revolting people, still as oppressed as before, scream the praises of their country/religion, and how no other country or religion would do that, and that is why their country/religion is the best.

For example, when women got the vote in the united states in 1924, Soviet women already HAD those rights and more for a while then. Upon getting the vote (not even basic rights like the right to make money or the right to go outside the house without male companionship), such women exclaimed ¨God Bless America!¨ And became martyrs for the capitalist regime.

Another example would be when Black people became treated as equal in America and Canada. They were not even considered human beings, and upon grave efforts, got minimal rights and exclaimed God Bless America!

A few years ago in Victoria BC, I was at the Gay Pride Parade. A rather flamboyant man came on the stage and said ¨Canada is the land of the free!!¨ *insert cheering here* ¨In this country I can get married!!¨.. Homosexuals had only gotten the right to marry a few months prior. The USSR and Nazi Germany had given gays that right far before the lynching of homosexuals had even become a mainstream practice in America.

What happened? These people had been disregarded from even buying houses and now they are full blown soldiers for the system?

The capitalist tyranny could only go about being successful when small tokens of effort have been given. If you refer to the pyramid I made lower on the page of my journal you will see the superficial barrier example. There is no change happening, but small rewards are being passed down in order for the true blind fellowship can flow.

People are having a hard time remembering that they dogs had more rights then they did a second ago, and still do. Why are people content with their small crumbles and not recognizing the fact they should have had those rights to start out with? Why are people ok with just a tiny crisp of the bag and not remembering that the same system they are advocating for to the death (see: signing your soul to satan) is the same system that bought the rope to lynch them with a month prior?

In the Capitalist system, there are no true freedoms, as by definition freedom means the ability to an independent entity of self. The ability to move without having to advocate your right to move. The ability to speak without having to advocate your right to speak or even debate or justify the means behind wanting to speak or for what.

The only freedom any human being ever has is the constant freedom to make an effort to achieve freedoms. You are free to try to be free. In that, humans are equal and free at all times. However when more and more people recognize this freedom, the system steps in to give them this said token that destroys this union ten fold.

In the end, the only democracy we have is the constant democracy of having no democracy thus, the efforts to achieve democracy. In my opinion, the closest we have ever gotten to truly having such actual freedom vs. mental freedom was in the USSR. I will get around to writing that sometime.

Those patriot Democrats scare the hell out of me. How could they possibly associate the charter of rights with God Bless this Country and Support our troops? Holy shit. Oh yeah, I forgot to write the bit about that support our troops thing. I will get right on that as well....

~Lynch~

¡ARRIBA!

2008-06-01T19:08:22Z

I am a Whore

I am a Nigger

I am a Queer

I am a Moor

I am a South American

I am a Woman

..... You are the different one.. IDIOT.

I would go to wherever this T-shirt is made just to buy it. ahaha.

~Lynch~

DON'T Free Tibet

2008-05-31T03:59:09Z

Yes. That is correct. DO NOT Free Tibet.

What the fuck is wrong with all you hippies? It just proves my point, that stupid hippies just like you would rather look at pictures Yahoo News decides to pimp out, and not actually read any unbiased information. Maybe that would cramp the whole RATM groove you have going on, the whole ¨Fight the man!!¨ thing. And so long as Yahoo spoon feeds you who the MAN is, you are good.

The Dalai Lama is nothing but PURE shit. He is a double dealer, a fraud and he recognizes his own insufficient capabilities and is setting out to NEVER be ruler of Tibet Again. Did you guys know that? I bet you didn´t.

"I firmly believe democratic institutions are necessary and very important, and if I remained at the head of government, it could be an obstacle to democratic practice. Also, if I were to remain, then I would have to join one of the parties. If the Dalai Lama joins one party, then that makes it hard for the system to work."

HOWEVER, the protesters claim that the Dalai Lama is the only way to restore democracy in Tibet.

During the time of Leader Mao Tse-Tung, he wooed him with poems (namely one, calling Mao the "Sun of all People"), letters and strong support. As Mao did back. However on the hippie´s end, they claim Communism is stunting the democracy in Tibet..... They claim Communist influence is nothing more then forceful invasion. And yet....

[An excerpt from the poem]

"Only limitless blessing could create such a leader like the sun radiating across the land. His writings are as precious as pearls."

He wrote a letter to Mao in 1951:

"Chairman Mao of the Central People's Government:

"This year the local government of Tibet sent five delegates with full authority headed by Kaloon Ngapoi to Beijing in late April 1951 to conduct peace talks with delegates with full authority appointed by the Central People's Government.

"On the basis of friendship, delegates on both sides concluded the Agreement on Measures for the Peaceful Liberation of Tibet on May 23,1951.

"The local government of Tibet as well as the Tibetan monks and laymen unanimously support this agreement, and under the leadership of Chairman Mao and the Central People's Government, will actively assist the People's Liberation Army in Tibet to consolidate national defense, drive imperialist influences out of Tibet and safeguard the unification of the territory and the sovereignty of the motherland. I hereby send this cable to inform you of this." "

Ahhh what lovely words to The Sun of All People, Mao Tse-Tung. The Great Communist Leader of China.

I fully acknowledge that only a small portion of China remains Communist, but this was at the time in which ALL of China was Communist, as well as in control of Tibet, with the Dalai Lama's blessings. Tibet is actually a part of China, they have always been a part of China, but they are a religious sanctioned area.

Oh.. But you sit in your hemp-organic computer seat (you bloody hypocrite), and say to me, "If Tibet was happy under China's rule, why is everyone screaming FREE TIBET now!?"

Well.. To put it quite simply, dirty Hippie #1... It is in American Interest to now propagate the Liberation of Tibet now. Remember when out of the friggen blue came "Operation Iraqi Liberation" ? Same shit, different country.

Obviously in the past 2 years China has been the source of ridicule, economical barge and American Interest, mainly because of the large increase in need for Cheap, easy labor and product, seeing as the American economy has not been out-preforming anyone lately, either (NOTE: Most likely because they have exhausted most of their forcefully-gained resources).

China obviously has something that America wants... Whether it be Molybdenum (See: http://www.resourceinvestor.com/pebble.asp?relid=29741 ... It is the next big thing), or to increase work production. America has now rattled the foundation of the safe, easygoing, Chinese Tibet that once was, and has turned it into basically a battle zone. Every American and their wife has a "Free Tibet" Sign up somewhere in their house, people are protesting China and it's market, denying help to the Chinese victims of the Earth Quake (although.. Tibet is offering help.. How strange for such an abused people to be helping the people who "abuse" them), protesting the Olympics and still do not know the whole story.

Tibet HAD socialist democracy. Now it HAS the thought that America can liberate it and it has been oppressed all these years. Funny how no one cried about it a few years ago, but SUDDENLY.... Kind of like Iraq, isnt it? When everyone was screaming "FREE IRAQ!!"

And while everything is going crappy in Tibet and America is ready to invade as the shining heroes (and everyone will LOVE them for it!), the Dalai Lama seems pretty good. Interviews every day on TV, suddenly having changed his mind about China..

We know that America has a motive to invade China, but what is his motive, I wonder.....

NEW YORK TIMES: "The Dalai Lama's administration acknowledged today that it received $1.7 million a year in the 1960's from the Central Intelligence Agency, but denied reports that the Tibetan leader benefited personally from an annual subsidy of $180,000.

The money allocated for the resistance movement was spent on training volunteers and paying for guerrilla operations against the Chinese, the Tibetan government-in-exile said in a statement. It added that the subsidy earmarked for the Dalai Lama was spent on setting up offices in Geneva and New York and on international lobbying.

The Dalai Lama, 63, a revered spiritual leader both in his Himalayan homeland and in Western nations, fled Tibet in 1959 after a failed uprising against a Chinese military occupation, which began in 1950.

The decade-long covert program to support the Tibetan independence movement was part of the C.I.A.'s worldwide effort to undermine Communist governments, particularly in the Soviet Union and China."

The longer we keep Tibet with China, the longer America is going to have to suffer. Hopefully in this time the true scheme will come out, and the free tibet mongers can go FUCK THEMSELVES.

Happy Friday.

~Lynch~

FOOLISH AMERICAN! THE GOGGLES! THEY DO NOTHINGGG!!!

2008-05-29T04:04:07Z

Hellur, Children, today we are going to contrast and compare Barack Obama with Hillary Cinton (this should be easy because there is such a fucking difference, as you all seem to think):

STANCE ON IRAQ: Barack: [Taken from official Websites]

"Obama will immediately begin to remove our troops from Iraq. He will remove one to two combat brigades each month, and have all of our combat brigades out of Iraq within 16 months. Obama will make it clear that we will not build any permanent bases in Iraq. He will keep some troops in Iraq to protect our embassy and diplomats; if al Qaeda attempts to build a base within Iraq, he will keep troops in Iraq or elsewhere in the region to carry out targeted strikes on al Qaeda."

STANCE ON IRAQ: Hillary:

"

"Starting Phased Redeployment within Hillary's First Days in Office: The most important part of Hillary's plan is the first: to end our military engagement in Iraq's civil war and immediately start bringing our troops home. As president, one of Hillary's first official actions would be to convene the Joint Chiefs of Staff, her Secretary of Defense, and her National Security Council. She would direct them to draw up a clear, viable plan to bring our troops home starting with the first 60 days of her Administration. She would also direct the Department of Defense and the Department of Veterans Affairs to prepare a comprehensive plan to provide the highest quality health care and benefits to every service member -- including every member of the National Guard and Reserves -- and their families."

Continued....

"She would devote the resources we need to fight terrorism and will order specialized units to engage in narrow and targeted operations against al Qaeda and other terrorist organizations in the region."

What, what in my butt? NO FUCKING DIFFERENCE. Both sites state that mediation between Iraq and neighboring countries would be set up, as well. Moving the fuck on...

STANCE ON HEALTHCARE: Barack:

In context of Availability (both sites use this word for the same thing, by the way):

"Guaranteed eligibility. No American will be turned away from any insurance plan because of illness or pre-existing conditions"

In context of Expense (ahahahaha yesss):

"Affordable premiums, co-pays and deductibles."

In context of Portability (Both sites also clearly use this word a lot):

"Portability and choice. Participants in the new public plan and the National Health Insurance Exchange (see below) will be able to move from job to job without changing or jeopardizing their health care coverage."

And now....

STANCE ON HEALTHCARE: Hillary:

In context of Availability:

"No discrimination. The insurance companies can't deny you coverage if you have a pre-existing condition."

In context of Expense:

"Unlike the current health system where insurance premiums send people into bankruptcy, the plan provides tax credits for working families to help them cover their costs. The tax credits will ensure that working families never have to pay more than a limited percentage of their income for health care."

In context of Portability:

"It's portable. If you change or lose your job, you keep your health care."

Once fucking more: Is there a difference? I thinks not. Funny how hard it was to find issues on Obama's website, however. He needs to write about 4000 lines before he gets to the shit.

ON THIS NOTE:

On Obama's website under Healthcare, he directly adresses: Mental Health Care, Autism, HIV and for some reason.. Lead Poisoning (something that only effects maybe 400,000 people in America). On Hillary's website under Healthcare, she directly addresses: HIV, Autism, Cancer, and Mental Health. Both sites also address Titty/Cervical cancer in the same manner.

Moving on.....

STANCE ON EDUCATION: Obama:

In Context of NCLB:

"Obama will reform NCLB, which starts by funding the law. Obama believes teachers should not be forced to spend the academic year preparing students to fill in bubbles on standardized tests. He will improve the assessments used to track student progress to measure readiness for college and the workplace and improve student learning in a timely, individualized manner. Obama will also improve NCLB's accountability system so that we are supporting schools that need improvement, rather than punishing them."

"NCLB" means, No Child Left Behind. Remember when that monkey Bush said it? Yeah.. He wasn't talking about Micheal Jackson.

In Context of Drop Out rates:

"Obama will address the dropout crisis by passing his legislation to provide funding to school districts to invest in intervention strategies in middle school - strategies such as personal academic plans, teaching teams, parent involvement, mentoring, intensive reading and math instruction, and extended learning time."

In Context of Afterschool Care:

"Obama will double funding for the main federal support for afterschool programs, the 21st Century Learning Centers program, to serve one million more children."

In Context of College/Secondary Education Grants:

"Obama will make college affordable for all Americans by creating a new American Opportunity Tax Credit. This universal and fully refundable credit will ensure that the first $4,000 of a college education is completely free for most Americans, and will cover two-thirds the cost of tuition at the average public college or university and make community college tuition completely free for most students. Obama will also ensure that the tax credit is available to families at the time of enrollment by using prior year's tax data to deliver the credit when tuition is due."

STANCE ON EDUCATION: Hillary:

In Context of NCLB:

"End the unfunded mandate known as No Child Left Behind."

Note: That is right, it is completely unfunded.

In Context of Drop Out Rates:

"Cut the minority dropout rate in half."

In Context of Afterschool Care:

"Double the after school program to ensure that 2 million young people have a safe and stimulating place to go between 3 and 6 p.m."

In Context of College/Secondary Education Grants:

"Create a new $3,500 college tax credit"

Damnit, I wish Obama was this Simple. But anyway, Hillary wants to utilize basically everything to try and get kids who are not interested in school or programs to work. While Obama just wants to fund them to hell and back for middle-professional programs and not focus on what they do if they do not want to be funded.

I notice that Hillary does want to pump billions into school/scholarship/at-risk youth programs, I looked and Obama does not mention on anything of the sort. Hilary also wants to give a 10,000 dollar scholarship grant to people who participate in Americorps for at least one year. Hmmm, I do not really like that.

STANCE ON VETRANS: Obama:

In context of their Homelessness:

"Obama will establish a national "zero tolerance" policy for veterans falling into homelessness by expanding proven programs and launching innovative services to prevent veterans from falling into homelessness."

In context of their Health:

" Obama will make the VA a leader of national health care reform so that veterans get the best care possible. He will improve care for polytrauma vision impairment, prosthetics, spinal cord injury, aging, and women's health."

STANCE ON VETRANS: Hillary:

In context of their Homelessness:

"In 2006, nearly 200,000 veterans were homeless on any given night. Hillary will establish a pilot program on homelessness prevention for veterans that will provide subsidies, eviction prevention, and one-time assistance for veterans who fall behind on their rent. She will also expand rental assistance for veterans by calling on Congress to fund an additional 20,000 housing choice vouchers exclusively for homeless veterans."

In context of their Health:

"As President, Hillary will ensure that all of the 1.8 million uninsured veterans in this country have access to quality, affordable health care. She will restore the Clinton-era policy that opened the VA’s excellent and cost-effective health care system to all veterans who seek to enroll. She will make a long-term commitment to the VA system to ensure it is adequately funded and has the capacity to avoid backlogs and to handle greater enrollments. And she will provide coverage through the American Health Choices Plan to all veterans who choose not to use the VA system."

I have yet to see a difference in any of the issues that I looked at so far. And to be honest, looking at their sites... There is no fucking difference. Even in the LAYOUT. It all comes down to:

Black Man

White Lady

Black Man who is related and in contact with Dick Cheney (shudders)

White Lady who is married to a pervert.

Black man that is in the "Elitist Club"

White Lady who's husbitch is a Freemason (HOLD ON, there is no fucking difference between the last two!)

But to all those fucking idiotic Americans ACTUALLY think there is that serious a difference: THERE IS NONE, ASSHOLE.

BUT there is a huge difference between Hillary, Hoe-bama and McCain!

STANCE ON HEALTHCARE: McCain:

"There is no such thing"

STANCE ON EDUCATION: McCain:

"Lul... Whut?"

STANCE ON VETRANS: McCain:

"COMMMIESZZZ?!??!?! WHEHHUURRR?!?!?!"

~Lynch~

Iranian Male Feminist JAILED

2008-05-26T13:36:03Z

Amir Yaqoubali, an Iranian Male feminist has been jailed for participating in the "One Million Signatures for Equality" Movement in Iran. The goal being to change Iran's Islamic and bias Custody, Inheritance, Governmental and Worker rights for Women in Iran.

He is one of the many who is in jail over these protests.

His charge is one year and 10 lashes in Prison.

DAMN. The tyranny of religion is obviously more clear then I had originally thought. I do not think people should have the right to be religious. It is wrong. Religion is nothing but indoctrination, anyway, most of them do not even know how they "found God". Well.. You found it when your parents started reading you Kabbalah quotes when you were 2 months...

Without the blindness of Religion, people can be free to express themselves and find a more.. Inner spirituality. That is a common myth, RELIGION DOES NOT EQUAL SPIRITUALITY.

Religion is no more then the massive indoctrination of random interpretations of a _________ (insert Holy Article there) that came from who knows where.

Spirituality is a greater awareness and an individual interpretation of the connection of one's self to the universe.

How can one actually look within themselves and to what is around them to determine a place in the world when there is a million different pushers beating them over the head TELLING them there is a god out there who is TELLING you where to be.

If people were spiritual and not religious:

Men would be free to express themselves in ways they really should be: Caring and respectfully

Women would not feel obligated to have a family and settle down, thus take over the professional fields.

Sexuality would not be a problem as everyone would understand that attraction is attraction, and there should be no guilty boundaries.

Abortion would not be an issue and leave the woman in a distressed mess, because it would be accepted as another thing in life, nothing affecting anything that has to do with the "afterlife".

People would be happier to work and think and read and relax.

Among so many other things.

Ok, thats it, I am buying an island and making a Communist Cult. Period.

~Lynch~

It's Fucking Friday, ladies and gents

2008-05-24T01:39:49Z

The thing that kills me about some old ladies is exactly what I posted before: THEY DEFY their societal roles. I fucking love it. Forget the image of a little old lady baking cookies, these bitches are out on the TOWN, ready to ROCK, toting alka seltzer and a 16 year old boy groupie who she picked up when she showed the boys at the skatepark how to roll a blunt.

She won't take any shit from you, she will shove her cane so far up your rectal cavity that you will not know what day it is. She drives a Oldsmobile 1945 and hasn't gotten a license renewal in over 40 years, and she will go on and on about how good her driving is while wiping the guts off of her grill and window.

She lives alone and while people feel sorry for her for being alone for so long after her husband died, she will laugh as you walk out the door, knowing that she was the one who killed her husband and she has insane sex with your son's best friend while no one is around.

She keeps a Beretta.. No, a Smith and Wesson in her little tiny bag which she has kept and continued to restore since she bought it in 1881, and while you want to go and help her for the bag looking so heavy for her little hands, she will pull that shit on your stupid ass so fast you will not have time to scream... AND THEN she will hide the body or make a pie of you, feeding you to the homeless with her air of nothing but goodwill. That is probably the only time the kick ass old lady makes a pie.

So next time you see an old lady with an AK47 Semi Automatic, go and hug them.. Just make sure you do not get in their line of fire.

EDIT: See? This is what I am talking about. You know 2 girls 1 cup? This 91 year old lady sat there, watched it and pissed herself while everyone to the right of her looked away in disgust! LONG LIVE OLD LADIES!

~Lynch~

Pool's Closed due to Juden

2008-05-22T15:19:17Z

Due to signs of alleged Jews in the pool, it shall remain closed until further notice.

I know you have allllllllll been waiting for my Hitler rant.

You knew it was coming. And here it is, better then ever.

HITLER was not a bad guy. There. I said it.

HITLER was after Zionists, Gypsies and Freemasons, and guess what? The majority of them are JEWS.

Funny enough, ol' Adolf was after the scum of the scum of our society. Zionists claim to be the people of God, convert anyone and everyone using violence, their ultimate goal was to enslave the non-Jewish race.
'
Freemasons? Fuuuck. I need not say much about it. I will put it this way, I MYSELF take any opportunity to kill a freemason I have.
And as for Gypsies, many of you think of the lovable little cart-living, bell-shaking, hunchback-of-notre-dame people who are all friendly and just trying to live off the land. Well sorry to say that is not what a Gypsy is.
Gypsies are basically homeless cheaters. They will do anything for money, making them the ultimate capitalists. And no, they do not do it because they need the money to live. They need the money to upkeep a lifestyle of deviance. The capitalist Gypsies will kiss or kill your mother for a dollar and on top of that, lie to cover themselves up.

Sick.

Hitler did not go and say, "If you are jewish, GET IN THE TRUCK!", hell no. Not like the Freemasonic Americans would like you to believe. He went after specific groups of people, and he was not for furthering the cause of Germany. He was not even GERMAN!

He was a MASTER of marketing. He knew that Germany, at the time, was not really on a very good bound of success regarding it's own economy and people. And by being that strong leader that they needed, he could also fool them into furthering his own cause. Hitler killed a number of "Aryan Germans" that were Freemasons or Gypsies. So the puzzle does not fit as lovely as you would think.

Hitler was also not a Christian or Catholic, as a matter of fact, Himmler was very big into Zen, Hinduism and Buddhism. So his thoughts were not to institutionalize a country of "God".

Both Hitler AND Stalin burnt down what (to the modern media) looks like Jewish Temples of Worship, when in fact they were Masonic Lodges (There is virtually no difference in style in the two's anything).

To your left you have a Masonic Hexagram, and to your right it is the Star of David. I honestly can't tell the difference, and both adorn Masonic lodges and Jewish Temples EVERY fucking where.

Anyway, Hitler was not that bad a chap. He was a master of marketing and was able to convince an entire country and culture that [if they helped him] they were the best country in the bestest of evers.

He should have seriously considered making his own advertising company.

You passionate fucking bastard!

~Lynch~

That Natural Order - All Lies - A New Rant from Gott Ist Tot

2008-05-20T03:09:11Z

That lovely little piece of us. That piece of our brain that tells us to classify and sort and judge so we can make more sense of the reckless world around us has finally gone out of control.

It is a computer, our brains. It needs to de-complexify the information going in, so it breaks everything down to mere labels. When something does not fit into the label our brain has made, we judge it, justify it, ridicule it and destroy it.

But now, now the functioning of our brains mixed in with the demon that is Capitalism has destroyed us all.

When you take the societal pressure of the media-conditioned clones of the marketed corporate control of society and mix it with the overpowering instinct to label you end up with an extremist ego. Because the sole human ego is the cause of Capitalism and most likely the human brain's instinctive function to sort and label in the first place.

Now, this may very well be a rant to top all rants, but it pisses me off how immediately when I meet someone or talk to someone they have IDEAS about me already. Like, before we even speak they know everything about me.

Look me up and down, what clothes am I wearing, what do I like to talk about, how short is my hair, how thick is my makeup? Dear Stalin! I try not to judge anyone when I meet them because it is IMPOSSIBLE to judge someone by how they look or talk.

Now I can indeed look at this from a psychological angle (Miss. Freud, there is a call for you on line two).

I can totally look at it logically, it is simply easier for us to classify based on what we can see then actually using our brains for a while to make a solid-truthful judgment. And when people/things do not fit into the little boxes we have created we get confused and angry at this.

Here is a great example:

Now what if I told you the Little schoolgirl was a raving lesbian and the Tomboy chick was 100% straight?

Not something you would expect, right?

Or an older example would be Homosexuality. When it first became a very public thing, people were upset, confused and angry. I mean, you look at men and think they are MEN, they fuck WOMEN, that is the way it WORKS! Especially if the man is big and masculine, you really do not expect it. As your brain has trained you to, as soon as you set eyes on someone, to put them in a little box and label it. When they break free from your stupid-ass box and are walking in between the lines, it makes you scared and confused. Look at it even on a more global scale, we have our thoughts about another country/race, and when they defy our thoughts we become objective.

I honestly look at people and shake my head a little bit. Humanity has destroyed itself. Eaten itself alive.

I find it the biggest possible scale you could look at is with Gender. As gender defies race, religion and country, so it could be one big ass example:

Women - Cook and clean and wear makeup and like shopping and love kids and are caregivers and lovers and emotional.

Men - Strong and powerful and like cars and construction and work full time and are hairy and non emotional and love sex and beer.

Now that that is out of the way, you can safely say at least a few things on that list ring a bell when you think of each individual gender.

These are not roles that exist in logic, but they are roles that we have kneaded and peeled for so long that they have become reality. And if anything steps out of those little boxes (once more), they must be something else. If a boy is playing with dolls, he must be gay. If a girl is rough and tumble and has short hair, she must be a lesbian or confused about her gender.

People talk about the natural order and that people are supposed to be as nature intended, men are supposed to be dominating and women are supposed to be caring and submissive. These are long roles also exemplified by the human ego and the "powers that be".

It has gone so far as to incorporate gender roles in government, law and religion.

I was recently approached by someone on a local internet forum I browse and called, "the most uber-masculine person on the board", saying that I could not possibly be the female I claimed in my profile. When I asked why, he told me that I did not act feminine enough. I have gotten this from a few people, and to be honest this probably contributed to why I am here typing away right now.

Now even if these gender roles are completely WRONG, logically idiotic and nothing more then a product of the media and human ego, we go with them anyway, thinking they truly must be correct as a result of the... WAY THINGS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE....

It is often called Ignorance when someone classifies away, however even BABIES, the supposed most "pure form of human" judges and classifies, however when applied in this sense it is called "conditioning". As they are a product of the judging environment around them.

We, as humans, PHAIL. Major D- in the "How good is your species?" Test. If anything it seems like we are at the bottom of the Natural Species Selection. We may be adaptable, but the knowledge we have is so limited that we must almost have to use our adaptability to cover our asses when nature comes after us for being completely retarded.

I look at the animal queendom and ask, "What would animals be at if they could judge like we could?"

Would the Zebras form a KKK? Would the Lions build a Masonic Lodge? Would the birds start a National Air Defense? Would the Male Chimps look at the female Chimps and tell them it was good for them to be in a bit of porn?

Everything in our society has been DERIVED from this judging. More then I had originally thought.

Unfortunately it has gotten us no where lower then Hell.

This has been a Gott Ist Tot rant.

~Lynch~

Why I hate you, Serj Tankian, because I do Hate Serj Tankian

2008-05-18T20:08:35Z

*You look sexier with that haircut, my dear Boy*

Strange thing coming from me, Eh?

As much as I respect Serj for being an ok guy, his heart is in the right place, unfortunately his brain is not.

He sulks and bitches about the Armenian Genocide and yet so conveniantly does not understand or adheed the injustice and bullshit happening within Armenia!

Armenia is NOTORIOUS for female abuse and pedophilia (Over half of Armenian women admit to being beaten or abused in their lifetime). But then again, Serj does not seem to be so straight edge himself. I am sure he is like one of the people who could defend his shit to the bitter end, and justify everything wrong with the cause. I hate him for this, mainly because he is trying to bring justice to a country's pride and union, while ignoring the fact that the country itself is a disgusting mess of domestic abuse, prostitution, child abuse, rape and corrupt police officers who take quite the lovely joy in acting God.

Sure, he could counter that and say "All countries have bad people", but that brings me to how the people make the country and not visa versa. Ever notice how, even if countries are really close together, they have TOTALLY different lifestyles, cultures and religions/beliefs?

Well, it is hellbent in Armenia's absolutely primitive and stoned thought that women are supposed to be this way and they should be beaten if they do not comply, and kids can consent to sex. There. Boogaboo.

It is the country that is oppressing and now it is screaming "Oppressed!!!"?

I was for the Iraqi war, not because I support or like America, but because Iraq has oppressed so many people for so long, that they can't scream oppressed now.

Now that Armenia has some big bad rock star up there representing it, it is starting to get a bit cocky.

Anyway, this is one of his many many many pathetic and undereducated thoughts on the world, here are some more:

In the song "Mesmerize", his/Daron Malakian's band sings:

"Why don't you ask the kids at Tiananmen Square, was fashion the reason why they were there..."

Well, to put it simply Mr.Tankian, Yes. Fashion was the reason they were there.

The "kids" at Tiananmen square were the protesting against the Chinese Government, through and through they were looking for a more.... hmm... AMERICAN rule. A more... Capitalist rule.

They wanted to make sure that they could be allowed to do whatever, whenever. And if that meant that they wanted Gucci pants and plastic dog shit for jokes, even though the government at the time found it soooo unnecessary (and it is), they wanted to have it. End of story.

They wanted to be able to protest for pay raises (which they, under a current capitalist government do not have anyway), they wanted to be able to say, "Hey man, I want a better quality of life!" (which, once more, they still don't have even under their extremist capitalist government) and not get beat up for being little shits.

I have spoken to Chinese from Mao's era (and even a tad post Mao), and they long for it back. They long for their old Communist government back because they are not so hard under America's thumb it is not even funny. More people are dying of not having basic necessities and shit really has not changed for the better now that they are able to say what they want.

Congratulations, kids. If you wanted to have some Gucci you could have saved up your money and gone to AMERICA with the rest of the consumer whores.

More on Mr. Tankian's Idiocies:

From a very recent Warsaw Interview:

"If you compare indigenous times with modern times, Indigenous times were more correlated with Matriarchal societies, where women had more of an I don't want to say control, but more of an openness to decisions having to do with society, because they were the bearers of family. Where if you look at modern society it's men who are more in control, and this comes from the Judeo-Christian culture. But even before that it comes from civilization itself, because civilization is based on agriculture. And agriculture is the man's world, and that's led to a little too much testosterone in bombs and all that."

Uhmm, Maybe Serjie would agree with Napoleon that women are no more than machines for producing children.

Unfortunately, my previous thoughts on the ancient Armenian Brain system was correct. But then again, I would be tackling a lot more then just Serj on this one. This is for anyone who wants to know...

Women have been TOLD to make children and be polite and raise families, that is the only reason they do it. Do you think at the dawn of time all women could think about is "Aww look how cute that baby is!" Or "awww I want a baby and to bare a family!" It is something that has been indoctrinated by society and women themselves to think that that is the only purpose for the existence of the female race.

And actually, if you knew a damn thing about Native Culture as you so claim to be reading up on, you would know that the Native people had women in control of everything from War to land to the Hunt because that is what they derived from nature itself. They saw that females in nature were more cunning and wise them their male counterparts, and also brought life into this world, making them far wiser then men and far stronger (I do not want to get into modern scientific details supporting this now, but check back when I am less tired). Women were not in charge of Family during that time. Not at all, Men were and women ran the greater details. Men were and are more emotionally complete to take care of kids. Women are more emotionally complete to take care of Business (It is true when you think about it. Men are great at not loosing their minds when a kid whines, and women are so emotional that they take everything into consideration with business. A perfect Swap).

And as for society and agriculture, you are wrong again, Serj. Society only went INTO agriculture because of Capitalism. Capitalism forced society to rely on agriculture and later industrial. So, people now did not work their own land for their own family, they worked it for everyone else. And even during the more simplistic times before the industrial revolution, men overtook fields, not because it was only they who were able, but because they convinced themselves that women were too weak, should not be strong, and should more focus on family. I am sure more then a few hairy feminists at the time wanted to own land and work it themselves, I am sure it was many women who wanted to work their own land, but were basically barred from it. Men have overtaken things in society where they want to be able to feel that they are the only ones who can do it. And as a result, only recently were women allowed to even think about going to medical and law schools or partake in construction work. And even now, women are not flocking because they are still recovering from the thought that their only purpose is to have a family and they should stick to little jobs assisting men. Well, as men rapidly fall from the workplace due to their own laziness and primal instinct to be wallpaper, women are taking over every "male" field and dominating it 20 fold better then men. Men have no natural "work", Mr. Tankian. Men have no natural "Control". Men have no natural, nothing. Everything they have they have killed and scavenged for, and now nature herself is ripping these positions from men.

Now go and wash my dishes, Serj. Iron my suit, I have a court case at 5.

On to more of the ass-clownery!

"We need to first apologize to Iran for helping to overthrow their democratically elected government in the 1950s led by prime minister Mussadaq, and installing a King (the Shah) whose repression led to the people bringing in a religious leader to lead them. We need to be aware of the repercussions of our long-term policies in the Middle East. We should not be talking about invading any other countries right now. Iran is no more a threat to us than Grenada."

The fact that you are still acting at this point like America really has honest-to-God foreign policy scares me, Mr. Tankian.

Our Policies are just as long term as the interests behind them. Right now, I do not think there is a soul alive (other then the stupid ass troops) that think we are in there to actually LIBERATE the Middle East. Everyone has basically put it together that everything we do in there is to get something they have, and basically that dictates our foreign and national policies.

Iraq WAS a threat? Ahaha. Afghanistan was the original Middle Eastern threat, because of Osama and the whole cover up of 9/11 (I am sure even Serj knows that 9/11 was just a reason to invade for oil, money and to evade the situation of the impending elections). It was very unclear, and still is, why we went into Iraq. It is just a coincidence that it has a shitload of oil and the best way to get to it was to convince everyone that their leader was corrupt and we should over throw him (same leader that refused to give the oil to the States, On that note, Afghanistan was even used for it's oil, Everyone knows Osama did not do it, but they *in their brave and honest search for him, mind you* were able to install a President that would allow them put a pipeline from Afghanistan to the Caspian Sea to funnel natural Gases).

America only installs power and invades countries where it can get what it wants. America is not even run by the government you can see, it is run by the government that you can only THINK of.

It is not even a government, it is a whole... SYSTEM. It is the system of capitalism and it is the system of human greed.

I would let Mr. Tankian himself pick whoever the hell he wants for President, would there be a change in the system? Hell no. The leaders "we" choose (who we do not even really choose in the first place), will do nothing but represent the system in a different way, every single one unique and thus making us feel like we actually decide.

Funny enough every single president is related to the Queen. But that is another tale.

Anyway, in conclusion Iran will be invaded if they have something we want, or if the newly elected president suddenly finds a "major" threat.

" A democracy without its citizens knowing the truth is not a true democracy. "

Hmmm. But that has been democracy for centuries. It has been democracy in definition, even.

Right there is the line between communism and democracy. Where Communism encourages intelligence, demo[n]cracy encourages an idealistic government:

The government convincing the people that they are free and yet still having all the corruption of a regular-republican shitter government. Hoorah.

Isn't that just peachy? The amazing talent to be friends and free leaders with the same people you are ripping off?

Here, this is a better quote from Me:

"A Democracy with enlightened citizens is called true Communism."

And now, My FAVORITE:

"SOAD's lead singer Serj Tankian's grandfather was raised in an American missionary orphanage in Armenia after his parents and family were exterminated. "I would not be alive if not for the American orphanages that raised my grandfather after the Armenian Genocide of 1915, so I have a lot of love and respect for the good things that America has and can continue to achieve," Tankian told CMJ magazine. Religiously inspired hatred and violence is a deeply personal reality for these four musicians. We may forget. They cannot."

So here he is bitching about the Genocide of the Oppressors once more, but within it is a very very very important bit. Can you find it?

Having a hard time? Well here, I will show it to you:

"so I have a lot of love and respect for the good things that America has and can continue to achieve,"

:-D Ahhha! He really will say anything to get that stupid "genocide" recognized, won't he? He will just suck the dick of George Bush to get his shit done. The TRUE seal of a democrat!

But anyway, in this tiny little sentence he reviles how much he REALLY knows about all of this, everything he ever spoke about is now in question by my lovely leeches. He clearly knows nothing of what he speaks.

I suppose it is not his fault, I suppose anyone in this world who thinks they have an understanding of it is off and skewed. I suppose I can understand that he has no idea of what he speaks because no one has taken the time to educate this poor soul (he has obviously not taken the time to educate his own soul before he speaks).

There is no good in Amerikkka, my dear Serj. Everything that America has ever done has been a front for something else. RIGHT DOWN to the basics.

The Red Cross was actually the reason why 10+ million people die per year because of AIDS. The red cross screened the blood, found the AIDS and then when it saw it was going to Africa, sent it anyway. Something they will never admit too, it is popular to believe they did it to kill off the African people.

Amnesty International (you know that stupid ass "NGF" organization Serj loves so much) is almost 100% funded by the government in cloak. Not financially, mind you, oh no they have regular people for that (they raised something like 2 or 3 million in 24 hours the day after 9/11). Here is an excellent excerpt from the site "Sigfried, Carl and Fred" at:

http://sigcarlfred.blogspot.com/2005/05/truth-about-amnesty-international-lies.html

"The media, in their response to the AI report are devoting millions of words excoriating the US, Israel and other democratic states. What the media and AI will not tell you is why there is an imbalance in the amount of words expended on the US, Israel and other states in the AI report. The fact of the matter is, outside of democratic states, AI is severely hampered in their information gathering. That's right- the worst offenders do not allow access to their countries. There is a dearth of information. In other words, AI is aware they don't know. AI can't be bothered to tell you that reality. If they did, their credibility as the informed source of human rights information would be compromised.

There is something else AI and the media won't tell you. What little access AI has to many countries is directly related to what they write about that country. Ask yourselves a question: Why would a country with a notorious human rights record allow AI back in, after a 'bad' report? The answer is simple. By playing down the severity of the human rights violations, AI guarantees itself the ability to return. Once again, it's about credibility. If AI can show 'access,' it is presumed they are reporting the truth. Notorious human rights violators are only too happy to be in 'middle of the pack."

Amnesty International HAS all the facts, and sometimes forges them for the sake of the Government, but ignore that. Those are just minor details. (Ever spoken to a North Korean? Yeah, they can speak to out of country people. And in fact, they are pretty sick of AI spreading lies about them and their country. Watch out AI, there is a few thousand very pissed No.Koreans up your ass, but it is good enough for AI if they can support the American Government to invade North Korea for their Molybdenum, right?).

Amnesty International is no more then a tool. It shows what it wants, and funny enough, most of the time what IT wants is what the government NEEDS them to say in order to confirm an invasion or.. lets say.. a genocide.

"Animals and Nature don't see borders"

Hmmmmm... You are an idiot, you know that? I hope you do by now.

I suppose Serj has never tried to enter a Lynx ring, or perhaps go about 2 feet up a tree, where Monkey's now consider theirs, and theirs alone. Dogs shit and piss to mark territory, and cats mate on the ground which they claim. Cougars rub themselves on rocks to leave their scents, and ants build small rings around their hill, marking their land.

Animals, quite clearly, see borders.

Animals are very scared and threatened ONLY when they leave their border, did you know that? When animals leave their land to hunt and whatnot, they are on extra attack mode, specifically because outside their border it is uncharted territory, it does not belong to them and they are making risks.

Animals make borders for protection and prowess, the more land a female or male has, the more attractive they become to a mate.

Humans make borders for power and to separate control and language. Of course we all know every leader is connected and working with each other (and not for peace, either), but I do not think Serj knows this.

Anyway! We have just proven Serj Tankian wrong, once more. Now will someone please throw him in a Lynx ring?

ANYWAY~ That is the end of my rant to Mr. Serj Tankian, ladies and gentlemen. Let's see if he ever gets this (and takes it to heart).

~Lynch~

No Smoking in the Venting Area, Fuckinhell!

2008-05-18T00:22:23Z

*Dun't Drown in bukket behbeh*

So, over the last little while I have been collecting and composing pictures and whatnot of the general stupidity of what are blubbering, stupid, moronic, blubbering icons of ignorance we call "Babies".

Don't get me wrong, I am very very fucking aware that they are little and cannnnn'ttttt unnnddeerrrsttannnd anything about the world. But here: There is no world, and thus nothing that fucking hard to understand. There is nothing so grand in this world that can't be summed up in about.... 20 minutes by one of the wisers of society (see: Teikko Lynch, Me).

Ahahaha, I forgot, there are no wisers in society (Only Me), society is so trained and bullshitted too that they can't help but bullshit back.

And this reflects in the most pathetic stage of a human: A Baby

Keeping my thought at bay that they look completely autistic and deformed, they are, and I suppose it really can't be their fault, complete products of the idiots who raise them.

Parents! You are all FUCKING stupid. Parents are so fucking hellbent on trying to make their kid in their own retarded image, that they miss the point of making their child sustainable for SOCIETY. They are so focused on shit like.... Keeping them away from things for long enough that THEY consider bad (IE: Drugs, sex, REALITY), and through being so focused on that, they refuse to teach them about anything useful. Everything that has to do with reality is useful. EVERYTHING. The more aware you are, the better off you are. Agree? Good.

Your LOVE for your child creates most all the problems we have in society today. It has created spoiled rotten teenagers who, in turn, do not know the value of education or working and end up either A) Leeching off of you for the rest of your life, B) Take the college money and drop out, or C) Work at Mcdonalds for the rest of their lives because you waited to damn long to push them out the door.

We are at a stage in history where we are now needing to teach children how to cut food:

Yes, that is right. The pieces are held together via Velcro. And you use the little knife to hack them apart.

And Taa-Daa. You have now taught your stupid shitter how to cut food (something that if they were native kids or actually aware of the world around them, they would learn by themselves).

Now let us look at if Parents were not so selfish and actually taught their kids about the world:

They would sure as hell not get raped by anyone anymore. They would know to be weary instead of going up to anyone, anywhere.
They would get a job at a younger age, thus not only would the economy be booming but they would have the money to move out earlier. Like in, let's say, Mexico. Where the average kid leaves at 13.
They would have money and be well off at a younger age.
They would know not to get into stupid media-clans causing not only eating disorders but usually group-minded murder.
And the list just goes on and on....

But really it is a mix of the Parents being too damn selfish to allow their kids to cut the umbilical cord earlier then.. Oh... I dunno.... 29? Then the parents make sure to kick their kids out because they need some penis-in-pussy time without their now 40 year old kid there.

If we taught kids in school about vocational trades or give them credit for working part time, not only would these kids have a jump start at life, but they would be stronger, smarter Youth!

The MYTH of Childhood! OH STALIN! Everyone who I propose this idea too says, "well if they worked, they would miss out on their childhood, and childhood is precious!".

Yeah, childhood is precious. TO YOU.

Childhood is a fun and exciting thing for the dead, dry-cunt assholes watching it who know they can never have their childhood back, but for the kids who are basically clueless until they are 20, it aint' so fun.

Childhood is nothing but ignorance. Have I said that yet?

Childhood is a stage where you are happily being lazy and oh so wonderfully protected by the people around you, watching cartoons and playing games with your feet and having absolutely nothing to do with REALITY.

Reality is.. I can't begin... To stress it's importance enough.

Why? Why is it so important when you are young when you have over 50 years of reality to live after you hit the streets on your own? They say WHY!? I say, when kids are taught about life and reality at a young age they are more prone to being successful on the 50 year road to death.

They get the joys of retiring early, and having their old age to relax and not worry, and they get the joys of being young and aware and happening in a world that basically censors everything you do from the ages of 1-17 due to that very same ignorance that is nothing but selfishness on the parents part. Every little restriction on kids out there today is because the kids walking around shriek in pain and confusion when they see anything that has to do with reality, and the parents cradle them against their bussom, "Oh my poor baby can't deal with that! That is too vulgar!" And people rule to make it illegal or out of reach until they hit 25.

But if these kids knew about it, and were educated on it before that government dictated age of 18, do you think they would react so harshly? I think not. I think that they are scared of things like sex and video games because it is soooo different from their little veggie tales cartoons.

And don't the parents take joy in censoring the world for their kids? Just so they can appreciate their ignorance (see: innocence) for another day.

Be ashamed and scared, parents. I am coming in the middle of the night to kill your babies.

~Lynch~

Writer's Block: Where am I in the garden?

2008-05-14T02:01:16Z

Well.... It's a writers block question. "What fruit or Veggie do I relate to the most".

That is a REALLY fucking stupid question, but oh well, lemme see.

I feel kind of like a deformed carrot. Yeah.

Why? Stop asking me these things, I DON'T KNOW! Go ask the flying monkey over that a way!

Fine... Well carrots are kind of... Deep. Really Deep. See.. They live in their earthy darkness until they are old enough to be exploited by their Human creators and their own fate is uncertain. Unlike the potato or the eggplant, the Carrot is very versetile and is used in so many ways that through it's own exploitation there is confusion. Confusion ABOUT the exploitation.

I could end up in a nice soup, or I could end up in a cheap BBW porno movie as a makeshift Dildo.

Exploit me, use me, for I am a carrot and I am one of the many greenhouse brethren that is to be destroyed and broken under your grasp of greed!

Never to see the sunlight until to be chopped up or rubbed up, Carrot is unaware of the beauty that is life, and the great feelings that come with being alive.

I am a carrot. I live in darkness and obscurity and I die alone and unaware.

~Lynch~

Why you Can't Change the world, shouldn't try, and are a sad, stupid hippie for trying:

2008-05-14T01:42:38Z

Yeah. You heard Me. All you stupid documentary makers, all you idiotic protesters.

STOP IT.

Let me show you the way the world works, mmmkay?

So what we have here is a pyramid of the world and I will explain to you how it works.

YOU and the SUPERFICIAL BARRIER:

Everything from You and society to the superficial barrier is a complete lie. THIS is where you can protest, and make fucking little documentaries and lie to yourself that you are doing something great and lying to other people that you guys are REALLY going to change something.

Well the people in Step 2 see you protesting and react WITHIN the superficial barrier (this is where you really think you have done something special, you fuck ass). This means that Step 2 sees you protesting, and reacts so Step 1 will believe that they actually have a say in the matter.

Step 1 has no say in the matter. But how convenient that it was set up to make up believe further and promote our country as being so excellent and freedom-loving (and after that, how we look down on other countries *rolls eyes*). Step 1 can protest and document all they want, their efforts are nothing but superficial.

Why, you ask? We are only scratching the surface of what possibly may be... THE END OF THE WORLD!

Well ok, not really. But we really are only scratching the surface, as you can see on the pyramid, there is many layers, and even more then that. The real scary part lies in that we have no idea where the bound of power ends. And it is scary as all hell that there are still people out there who think that the Government is elected by us and that they are the power. Those are the same people who think that they can protest and it will somehow dote up to something. Those are also the same people who wear the illusive "I love America" T-shirts, and lest we forget the big ass Yellow-ass "SUPPORT OUR TROOPS" badges on their windows and foreheads (I will make a post about those retards later!).

However it is so excellent for those at the top that we truly believe we are free and, of course, to the point where we look down upon other countries, dictate how THEY live, and make sure to close up our very free borders because our very free jobs are very freely ours. OURS.

The only thing we can possibly do within this superficial barrier is become AWARE (and stop trying to be stupid fucking hippies, of course. I hate you all. I wish you death).

The next step I wrote on the Pyramid of Awesomeness is MONEY. Why did I do that (you may beh askinh)?

Money is the motive for all actions. When you are in power, you ARE not at the top, anyone who has more money then you, in fact, is higher then you. Because they can shake the lettuce and the little bunny will come running. Corporations OBVIOUSLY have vested interests, and corporations basically rule our little existences within the superficial barrier. Everything you have and are, corporations decided that.

As a note, it is funny how it basically is like stairs. We are ruled by those who rule and are ruled by those who rule above the rulers and they are ruled by those who rule the ruler's rulers, Etc... CEPT THESE STAIRS DON'T REALLY HAVE A DOOR AT THE FUCKING TOP (If there even is a top).

Corporations rule media, and I am sure the average person (who has half a brain) would say the media is a tad sketchy. Media decides the lives of young, very influence-fucked children thus is effecting the adults of tomorrow (scary shit), it decides Gender differences and where the genders should be (quite obviously), it decides what people should buy, when they should buy it and it becomes the overall "Conformists" Monopoly (IE: If you do not have this, you are different, if you do not act like this, you are strange).

And like little ants we line up at Wal-Mart to purchase everything they told us to buy, almost subconciously justifying it and saying how much we need it and how great it is.

We shut our brains off to the fact 3 year old kids are working 17 hour shifts at a penny a day so we can buy these items that we "need so damn much". We all know it very well. You ask the average person and they will say "well yeah, it's sad..." But will they ever do shit?

Once more the powers that be laugh as we are given all the information and are too under control to ever possibly try to even stop it.

Corporations also rule decisions based on Market. Whatever they need to make money on, they make sure it is plugged by our so excellent and fairly elected "rulers". As for those "fairly" elected rulers... Ahem. Funny enough, they are like plugs. Plugs for everything. Nothing but an advertisement and we are so hellbent on the "FREEDOM" Of the country that we ignore the fact that they seem to go hand and hand with so many corporations.

As you can see, Money is supreme. But not more so then the Human Ego.

Because where in the hell would money or power matter if Human Ego did not exist? Do you think Dogs or Birds think about how powerful and great they are (or must be)?

Everything in this world is fueled by money and created by human ego.

What is it about humans that makes us so selfish and stuck up? Obviously animals do not have this issue, however they have all the feelings and thoughts that we have. But only humans can take those feelings and thoughts and make it God.

Like we all talk about the Illuminati and Knights Templar (arguably the same things). What... What would possess a person to invent the idea of supreme power, and go so far as to trick, kill, cheat and deceive every human on earth to keep such power?

What draws people to madness?

Back on topic, Human Ego! It just convinces me that we are a joke, one of Dante's stories. Just an experiment, and we failed miserably. When one can believe that they are better and more powerful then another, it is over. The game is lost.

Money, for some reason, was almost like the cart for the ego. It was the chosen "idea". It has succeeded in it's mission of overruling people's lives, and it has been like a hook and bait, luring people, getting them hooked and unable to swim away. However, the powers that be keep us underwater, So like the stupid fish we are we can believe we are unhooked and free (See: Superficial barrier, Also See: BEST analogy EVER).

And now, The illusive TOP. The top of the pyramid.

What is there?

Illuminati? It would be explained by the Human Ego theory I just proposed, it would explain a shitload of the stuff happening in the world right now.

Ignorance? Is it just truly a series of unfortunate events, powered by our own repetitive stupidity?

Divine Comedy? Are we truly just a joke, an experiment, for some sort of higher power?

We have no idea who is above us, and what is going on in our world. We are stuck in a loop of bullshit that no one seems to be able to grasp or accept. We are stuck on the hook and we are swimming around like everything is just peachy. It could be a mixture of these things.

It could be like... Illuminati IS the divine which controls our natural fallacies.

It could also be Elephant Monsters from the planet Pasta. But that is too damn easy.

..... Or....... Is It?

~Lynch~

So... Here We Are...

2008-05-12T00:14:58Z

First Post...

Not Much to say, I suppose.... Perhaps I will just introduce myself...

My name is Lynch, I live in Saint John, New Brunswick (the mutherfucking GHETTO!).

What Am I? Tough question to answer. I really do not know Myself, myself. If you know me, there is a reward for a detailed description. All rights of the description will be submitted to me upon receiving payment.

So far the descriptions of myself I get from people:

"A Bright individual with a few social issues.." - My Teachers (THEY LOVE DESCRIBING ME AS BRIGHT!!! LOVE IT, FUCKING LOVE IT! Not one teacher I have ever had has said anything other then "BRIGHT")

"A Morbid bastard that needs to go back to hell where she came from..." - My Mother

"A really smart person with a great personality and a huge tendency to be a total bitch. There. Now I want my sugar crispies!" - My Dog (Peanuts)

*Those are Some of the Many*

What is my Journal going to be about? Well I have no idea. I suppose I am going to use it more or less like a blog... But I hate that word, thus "Journal".

I AM a tad Pedophilic. I do not think Germaine Greer would have tagged me as so (anyone who has read her work will know what I mean), but I suppose I do enjoy the hairless, youthful, naive, curious boys over the completely wayward bitches that are the male race. All they do is complain anyway, wahhh wahhh. But I am no lesbian.

That is a fun fact about me, I am an asshole, I hate men, I totally reject all aspects of motherhood and femininity AND (despite popular thoughts) I am not a Lesbian.

EDIT: Please do not leave comments, I am turning them off and making them email approved, mainly because this template, while nice, is stupid and fucks up the layout when someone comments.

Until I get some motivation....

~Lynch~